Wednesday, October 28, 2009

365/13 "Kid"


Try this: make a list of 365 people whose names you remember and who were interesting to you. Even if you don't want to write 40 about each, at least try making the list. And then, if you can, write down a few words about each of them before they're gone from your memory. If you can't do this, it might be wise to spend the next 365 days meeting more people in person who are interesting to you. Learn their names.

It has been a while since I blogged anything that I consider to have "content". This 365 idea is one I started a while ago and one I am interested in following through with. I think I am gearing up for NaBloPoMo and trying to post every day of the month.

So here is something about "Kid" and why he was interesting to me.

Kid came into a group home type setting when he was under the age of twelve. We didn't get many kids that young unless there was some reason they were sexually inappropriate with the kids in the kid shelters. So without knowing a bunch about his background we knew there was some sexual stuff. It turns out kid was removed from the care of his mother when he was under the age of four. His step father and a series of mothers boyfriends had physically abused him so severely that when he was under the age of one he had bones broken. MANY bones broken. Does it go without saying how horribly sexually abused he was? He lived at first with grandmother but she had mental health issues and became homeless and they lived together in her car until they were reported and he was taken from her. He went to other family members and was accused of being sexually inappropriate and placed temporarily with us. I'm not going to sugar coat anything - he acted out sexually in mind boggling ways. He completely annoyed the female staff and for good reason. I will not know until the day I die why I connected with this kid. Everything about his behaviors were (and are) a "turn off" to me. And somehow I liked him. A lot. I liked him enough that if we had been able to be foster parents I would have taken him into my home - and I can't say that about any other kid but ONE in all my years of working with teens.
He went from our place to a young sex offender home (please don't get me going on THAT topic). To my knowledge he was never "out" of group homes until he aged out of the system.
I have kept some track of him over the years although we were never in contact after he left the place I worked. The last I heard of him he was being incarcerated for sexual predation in a public park. I read an interview by the father of one of the kids he lured. The man was livid (understandably) and completely vilified this sexual predator (understandably). I don't blame him one bit, and yet in the back of my mind - or closer to the front of my mind - was the fact that I knew this kid. I knew him when he was a little boy. I am so very sad for him and for the life he has lived on this earth. I know there are people who will hate my opinion. I know there are people who don't agree with me, and yet I still shed a tear, yes a tear, for the tiny tiny baby who had his arms and legs and collar bone broken, and wonder what his life would have been like if someone had cared for him.

one day while we were driving with him and other kids to go sledding, we were pulled over in the youth corrections van for going to fast, He was in the seat right behind the driver, by friend Louie. The officer wanted her to giver her name and address and phone number but she didn't want Kid to hear her giving her personal information so she was trying to whisper to the officer out of the window. Every time she whispered the officer said"WHAT" and made her repeat what she had just said. Every time she repeated herself, Kid leaned closer to her to hear what she was saying. I know she was not amused but I found it very funny. Finally she said her phone number loud enough for the officer - and Kid - to hear it and as the officer wrote it down, kid started to chant it. "seven seven threee....." He kept it up all day. no matter what he was threatened with he could not even get himself to stop. Since it wasnt my number, I thought it was hilarious, but I can see how infuriating it was to her. I just don`t know what I liked so much about this kid!

No comments: