Ten on Tuesday

Ten things to do before you get married.

Theoretically I have a problem with the whole "marriage" thing because unless you are lucky and live in Canada where we do , you CANNOT get married if you are gay. So that would be me, not being married. I am going to suspend my reality for the purpose of this post and pretend that the world is a just and humane place EVERYWHERE and that gay marriage is allowed all over the world and just respond to the damn topic.

1. Be able to be alone, by yourself. Be able to go to a movie and a restaurant alone and not feel like a freak.

2. Pay your own bills. Car payment, insurance, rent, utilities. Have a job!

3. Date lots. Go out with lots of different people and when you find the one you want to marry, date them lots  - but don't stop just cause you get married. Heck, (wow - that was a bit of latent Mormonism popping out of me in that phrase!) I think you should fall in love and get your heart broken at LEAST once so you  have something to compare this "marriage" relationship to, and so that you don't look back 20 years later and wonder if you missed something cause you never loved anyone else.

4. Travel together. A road trip, whatever, just figure out if you are compatible in a small space together for a long time. You shouldn't eat nuts on this trip though. That might be a bad idea, but it will give you a chance to see how they pack and what treats they bring for the road. Are you both talkers? both silent? Do you stop at every road side pull out for a walkabout or do you have to bring your own pop bottle to pee in because you aren't stopping for hell or high water? Do you listen to the radio? Do you listen to books on tape? Do you sing loudly and off key for hours and hours on end? These are IMPORTANT things to know people.

5. Grocery shop together. You wouldn't think this was important but I've seen some doozy fights in grocery stores. I will confess to having been in one or two arguments myself (in the meat department).

6. Fight. Yeah argue. You have to know if the person you are planning on being with for the rest of your known days fights fair and if you can resolve stuff. Don't avoid the "tough" issues because you don't want to ruffle feathers. Feathers will get ruffled down the line and you should know that you CAN get through these times.

7. Cry in front of them. I'm not recommending that you do this with every person you ever date, but before you get married, when you have found "THE" one, you have to cry in front of them. Pull out all the stops. Watch some sappy old movie from the 80's like "Beaches" or something ("Set it Off " worked VERY well for me) and let it all out. Blubber, Slobber, get the whole ugly cry face going and see if they can handle it or if they run away very far, very fast. If you find someone who can deal with your ugly face cry - they are a keeper fo sho.

8. Do your own laundry. Do I need to say more than that?

9. Listen to your friends opinions of the person you are considering marrying. This may seem stupid and redundant and in reality when you are head over heels in love with some jerk you aren't going to listen to your friends anyway because the jerk will have convinced you that your friends are jealous of him (or her) and he'll tell you "of COURSE they are going to try to tell you they don't like him (or her)." But SERIOUSLY... if your friends think this dude (or dudette) is a loser....

 

10. How can I say this....... Know what you like.  If that wasn't clear - then you aren't ready to be married.

Adoption frustration

I have not posted many things about our journey to adoption but this past week has frustrated me so much I am writing about it here today to vent. This process is so scary and at every step we are so concerned with saying everything "right" and not making waves because we want everything to go smoothly, and this week I have had enough.
We are foster parents. We have had Max (not his given name (yet) for anyone concerned with privacy issues) since he was released from the hospital at one month of age. He is 18 months old. When he was 6 months old his parents rights were terminated by the court and he became a permanent ward of the province and able to be adopted. Since we were his foster parents at the time we asked if we might adopt him. We were told that we could, but that we needed to be approved as an adoptive home first.
We met with the adoption worker. (Please note here that the SAME office with the SAME supervisor operates in our region as the foster AND permanency placement.) In order to be foster parents we have to go through a process of becoming certified and maintaining that certification on a yearly basis. We have to have medical records, police checks, home inspections and everything for foster care EVERY year. Well apparently this is not enough for the permanency workers, so we have to do ALL of this again. OK. So we do it. All of it. All over again.
And we get approval to be an adoptive family.
While all this is happening we go through three, yes THREE permanency workers. And while I am sure they are all very nice individuals, the first was pregnant and getting ready to go on maternity leave and did..... oh right NOTHING on our file. The second ROCKED and in the SHORT time that she was assigned to our case we met with her a number of times, she kept us informed with emails regarding what she needed, what she was working on, what to expect etc. When the first worker didn't return from maternity leave and the position opened for a full time position we hoped against hope that the lady filling in would be selected. Much to our chagrin, she was not.
We are now on permanency worker number three. Last week she came to our home to meet with us. She sat, took notes, and asked us all kinds of questions about how Max was doing. We updated her on speech therapy issues and other events and asked her how our file was progressing. She did what we know her to do (from past experience) - evaded the question - and said only "your file is progressing." What does that mean? She said she didn't have the complete file from the last worker, but the last worker was waiting on info from HER for the file. Huh? Confused yet? Us too.
After she left and Shel and I were able to process this information we decided that the LACK of information was a problem for us and we called our foster worker to let her know of our frustration. She passed the message on to their supervisor (again, SAME supervisor) and the supervisor called us. First of all our foster worker said that there was a piece of documentation that they still needed from me. Fine. Why didn't the worker tell us that when she was IN our home and could have taken it with her? Has she even opened our file? If we had not called to check the status when would she have asked for it? The supervisor left a message to say she had reviewed with the permanency worker what was on her plate and if we wanted to meet to discuss the priorities (blah blah blah) to call her on her direct line. Now tell me this. What good is a direct line if you don't answer your phone? This is where we sit. I have called that number - enough to be a tad irritating if she is checking her caller id - I have left my name and number and she has not called me back.
I know that the journey to adoption is long and filled with red tape for everyone who tries to navigate it. Somehow I thought since everything was being done in the same office it would somehow be easier. I was deluding myself.
Ai ai ai ai ai.

unconscious mutterings

Money :: money, money, it's a rich mans world
Unhappy :: tears
Joking :: "you said the world was magic i was wide eyed and laughing" - indigo girls song
Chipmunk :: cheeks
Date :: night
Slideshow :: my dad's short shorts poolside
Chicago :: Oprah
Lifetime :: of pain
Skid row :: band "I remember you"-song
Edward :: Prince

friday fill ins

1. Finding a great book is so exciting!
2. Strawberry fields forever.
3. Hot Cross Buns sound like they would taste delicious!
4. Why does sleep make me feel so good?!
5. A show on Broadway is something I've always wanted to see.
6. It's sad when life isn't what you expect it to be.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to reading, tomorrow my plans include making hot cross buns and Sunday, I want to celebrate my favorite holiday with Max!

level up

I found this when I was checking out Thursday thirteen bloggers and not commenting - like I do. But I will send you there to check it out :

http://awesomerandomosity.blogspot.com/

Leveling Up

Level 1
(x) Smoked a cigarette.
(x) Smoked a cigar.
(x) Kissed a member of the same sex.
(x) Drank alcohol.

Level 2
(x) Are/been in love.
(x) Been dumped. (and punched after being dumped for moving on)
( ) Shoplifted.
( ) Been fired.
( ) Been in a fist fight. ( I don't think so, but I would like to have been)

Level 3
(x) Had a crush on an older person.
(x) Skipped school.
(x) Slept with a classmate. (I think we were sleeping together before we were classmates.)
(x) Seen someone/something die. (one of the most painful moments of my life)

Level 4
( x) Had/have a crush on one of your friends who is now on Facebook. (Billy Bugden- yup. You read it here first)
( ) Been to Paris.
( ) Been to Spain.
(x) Been on a plane.
( ) Thrown up from drinking.

Level 5
( ) Eaten sushi. (not in this lifetime)
( ) Been snowboarding.
( ) Met someone BECAUSE of Facebook. (I told you I don't do Facebook.)
(x) Been in a mosh pit.

Level 6
(x) Been in an abusive relationship. (psychologically for sure)
(x) Taken pain killers. (when I was in pain)
(x) Loved someone you couldn’t have.
(x) Laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by.
(x) Made a snow angel.

Level 7
(x) Had a tea party.
(x) Flown a kite.
(x) Built a sand castle.
( ) Gone mudding (offroading).
(x) Played dress up.

Level 8
(x) Jumped into a pile of leaves.
( ) Gone sledging. (huh?)
(x) Cheated while playing a game. (especially Clue)
(x) Been lonely.
( x) Fallen asleep at work/school.

Level 9
(x) Watched the sun set.
(x) Felt an earthquake.
( ) Killed a snake.

Level 10
(x) Been tickled.
( ) Been robbed/vandalized.
(x) Been cheated on.
(x) Been misunderstood.

Level 11
(x) Won a contest.
( ) Been suspended from school.
(x) Had detention.
(x) Been in a car/motorcycle accident.

Level 12
( ) Had/have braces.
(x) Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night.
(x) Danced in the moonlight.

Level 13
(x) Hated the way you look.
(x) Witnessed a crime.
(x) Pole danced. (eat your heart out - they WISH they had hired me!)
(x) Questioned your heart.
( ) Been obsessed with post-it-notes. (but I do like glue and candle wax)

Level 14
(x) Squished barefoot through the mud.
(x) Been lost.
(x) Been to the opposite side of the world.
(x) Swam in the ocean.
(x) Felt like you were dying.

Level 15
(x) Cried yourself to sleep.
(x) Played cops and robbers.
(x) Recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers.
(x) Sang karaoke.(and won a competition THANK YOU!)
(x) Paid for a meal with only coins.

Level 16
(x) Done something you told yourself you wouldn’t.
( ) Made prank phone calls.
(x) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose.
(x) Kissed in the rain.

Level 17
(x) Written a letter to Santa Claus.
(x) Watched the sun set/sun rise with someone you care/cared about.
(x) Blown bubbles.
(x) Made a bonfire on the beach or anywhere.

Level 18
( ) Crashed A Party.
(x) Have travelled more than 5 days with a car full of people. (my family)
(x) Gone rollerskating/blading.
(x) Had a wish come true.
(x) Slept with a member of the same sex.

Level 19
(x) Worn pearls.
(X) Jumped off a bridge.
( ) Screamed “penis” or “vagina”.
( ) Swam with dolphins.

Level 20
( ) Got your tongue stuck to a pole/freezer/ice cube.
( ) Kissed a fish. (huh?)
(x) Worn the opposite sex’s clothes.
(x) Sat on a roof top.

Level 21
(x) Screamed at the top of your lungs.
( ) Done/attempted a one-handed cartwheel.
(x) Talked on the phone for more than six hours (in one day).
(x) Recently stayed up for a while talking to someone you care about.

Level 22
(X) Picked and ate an apple right off the tree.
(x) Climbed a tree.
(x) Had/been in a tree house.
(x) Been scared to watch scary movies alone. (I won't watch them period)

Level 23
(x) Believed in ghosts.
( ) Have had more than thirty pairs of shoes
(x) Gone streaking. (in the winter, DUMB)
(x) Visited jail. - (Actually I think it was a halfway house?)

Level 24
(x) Played chicken. (Not with cars, but the idea was the same.)
(x) Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on.
( ) Been told you’re hot by a complete stranger.
(X) Broken a bone.
(x) Been easily amused.

Level 25
( ) Caught a fish then ate it later.
( ) Made a porn video.
( ) Caught a butterfly.
(x) Laughed so hard you cried.
(x) Cried so hard you laughed.

Level 26
(x) Mooned/flashed someone.
(x) Had someone moon/flash you.
(x) Cheated on a test.
(x) Forgotten someone’s name.
( ) French braided someone’s hair.
(x) Gone skinny dipping.
( ) Been kicked out of your house.
(x) Tried to hurt yourself.

Level 27
(x) Rode a roller coaster.
( ) Went scuba-diving/snorkelling.
(x) Had a cavity.
( ) Black-mailed someone.
( ) Been black mailed.

Level 28
(x) Been used.
(x) Fell going up the stairs.
(X) Licked a cat. (well.......)
(x) Bitten someone. (only if they tell me to)
(x) Licked someone - not in private places.

Level 29
( ) Been shot at/or at gunpoint.
( ) Had sex in the rain.
( ) Flattened someone’s tires.
(x) Rode your car/truck until the gas light came on.
(x ) Got five dollars or less worth of gas.

Thursday thirteen: things I learned as a carny




Thirteen Things I learned as a carny 1. There's lots of drugs at Carnivals. 2. There's lots of unprotected sex at carnivals, in wierd places. 3. Carnival food will make you sick after eating it every day for an extended period of time. 4. You can make lots of money in a short amount of time - if you work the right games. 5. You can spend a lot of time and make no money at all if you are not willing to "play the games". 6. Not everyone who works at a carnival is dirty, but most of them are! 7. People at carnivals spend a LOT of money for crappy prizes. 8. Blowing up balloons without a machine hurts the lips, lungs and fingers. 9. There are ways to cheat every system, even the system of buying tickets to play games. 10. Men have huge egos, and when it comes to smashing beer bottles with baseballs, and you can REALLY take advantage of that and make a lot of money. 11. I would never ride a carnival ride. 12. Carnival music may sound fun and cheery when you visit for an hour or two, but when you have to work next to a ride all day that is pumping out cheesy music on a two minute loop you want to kill yourself at the end of the day. 13. Wear good shoes.




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18 months old today

Hey there my main man.

Today you are 18 months old. In the month since you were referred to a speech therapist (your first appointment is tomorrow) you have started to be more consistent with your sounds. Everytime one of the pets walks into the room you distinctly say "hi" to them, though why you don't greet anyone else this way still confounds me. You have started to say "ma" with regularity. Your mom can distinguish between your calls to her and your calls to me, but I still struggle with knowing who exactly you are talking to. This month you also mastered drinking out of a cup without spilling everything all the way down your front - which never seemed to bother you anyway!You are learning things in leaps and bounds. Sometimes it is hard to keep up with all your new skills.

Your mom spent some days in the hospital this month and I don't think any of us weathered that storm well, but your visits to the hospital room were a bright moment and you were absolutely in heaven with all the buttons. Believe me, if I could find a bed like the hospital one for us to bring home, your obsessions with all things button related would be well on it's way to being fulfilled. If the hospital in town weren't only full of old dying people we would stop in and visit some of the oldsters just so you could play with the beds. (Unfortunately I think some of them would have a cardiac arrest and we know the hospital staff here are not equipped for medical emergencies so we will spare us all that tradgedy).

This last week has brought to light some of the challenges of the foster-adoption program, but your mom and I are working on them. Don't ever think for one minute that you don't have anyone in this world fighting for you. Your mom is the epitomy of a mother bear whose babies are threatened when she goes on the offensive on your behalf. I'm fairly confident that whatever has been holding up the system and your permanaent adoption will be resolved quickly as we dig our heels in to bring you to our family "forever".

The highlight of my day has become the time we spend playing when I get home from work. The last few days we have played so hard you have been sweaty and breathless from laughing and running. You are such a joy.

Rest your head close to my heart, never to part, baby of mine.

March in Utah and March in Northern Alberta

This is what it looks like at work today.
I suppose for St. Patty's day we could have been inventive and painted the snow drifts green. Maybe next year.





This is what it looked like yesterday at my alma mater - WSU in Ogden, Utah.
When I lived in Utah I could not wait to leave.
I miss it. When I see pictures like this I REALLY miss it.

St Patrick's day

Yesterday for St Patricks day I stopped at the store for some treats to take home and looked for something "green". With all of his allergies M really is restricted on the treats he can have which worked out ok anyway since the grocery store was LAME and had NOTHING green - not cookies, not anything. What's up with that?

I purchased lime kool-aid and Shel mixed it up. M is drinking from a cup at suppertime now and he was ALL about the lime koolaid. He used his new favorite word.. "more" over and over. Forget about the pork chop or tater tots. For supper last night M had ketchup and kool aid.

Ten places I'd take a tourist to see in my hometown

For the purpose of this entry I will assume that this means the town I am currently living in. This question makes me laugh. I live in a teeny town and thinking of ten things to show a tourist in quite a mental exercise.

1. The four way stop. We only have one in the whole town and it is new since we moved here. I like to think that ouraddition tot he community population influenced the decision to add a four way stop.

2. The pool. We have a nice indoor pool and waterslide. In the summer it would be cool if the pool had a roof that retracted so we could be outside, but the fact remains that we have more winter months than summer months, so the indoor pool is nice.

3. The campus. Especially in the summer months the campus is a beautiful place to be. We have beautiful flower gardens, even though some of the most beautiful are in obscure places. It is nice to walk around campus and the three hole golf course and pond in the summer.

4. The Mall on Main. Don't be fooled by the title, which is why we need to stop by. We have a "mall" but all that is in the mall is a restaurant, a realtor office, a photo lab, a greyhound depot and a novelty store. The fact that it is called "the mall" is humorous - to me at least.

5. The town clock. This is another addition to the town since we have lived here. The clock has three sides and on the side of the clock that is visible when you LEAVE town it says "Welcome to FV". Really, who thinks of these things?

6. Dunvegan Bridge. The bridge is not actually in town, but it is one of the ways to get into town and it is fairly significant as a suspension bridge in the far north. At the bottom of the bridge are gardens and a little store and mini golf spot which are a nice touristy thing. They have an ice cream parlour which we visit at least once a summer and they have maypole dancing (which I have yet to attend).

7. The Northern Lights. I can't really "order" northern lights for guests to see, but we get some spectacular showings. One of the things I LOVE about where we live is the sky. The stars at night are so bright it is amazing. I can even see the milky way - which from a city is impossible.

8. The wildlife. My parents came up to visit and we bragged up how much wildlife there was to see. Of course the whole time they were here everything was in some kind of wierd hibernation. Thankfully when they came back we saw lots of moose, deer, coyotes, and an amazing array of birds. Our garden is quite a bird sanctuary and I am sure once my spouse gets into the garden and does her magic there will be more birds and other wildlife. You KNOW if someone comes here from out of town they will get a grand tour of our acreage. I AM paying a 30 year mortgage, so someone else needs to get some appreciation out of it.

9. A walking trail. I will admit I ran out of ideas and I had to ask a co-worker. She suggested the walking trails which give a nice view of the golf course and small lake.

10. oh, oh oh! A PLAY! I was in a play in the theater. But depending on what time of year a visitor would come to town there are some community events each year, the rodeo (which I have not attended), kidfest (which I have attended), the drag races (haven't been there yet), the car show (been there!), air show (been there!), and in the winter there are hockey games and curling bonspiels(and karaokee competitions where the competition is tough) . The community really does take advantage of the summer months.

the "F" word

I am constantly taken aback by how many people find the word "feminism" offensive.

I will admit that for many years I had a problem with defining myself as a feminist, but my reasons were not because I am opposed to the concepts of feminism as much as I found "femisists" to be upper class white women. I called myself a "womanist" in an attempt to be more inclusive of all races and classes of women but I believe the battle over words blinds us to the issues and so now I have no problem calling myself a feminist.

I was sitting in my class this weekend listening to presentations. A woman in my class was talking about how, as a single professional woman, people still make the assumption that she drives her husbands car, or that she is married and that is why she lives in a nice house. She was offended by these assumptions but then made it pointedly clear that she is NOT a feminist. WHA? HUH? I'm confused. Why does she consider herself to NOT be a feminist? She works and has workplace rights. She expects equal pay for equal work. She votes. She has the right to contract and property, I'm pretty sure she believes in her right to bodily integrity and autonomy (especially on matters such as reproductive rights, including the right to abortion, access to contraception and quality prenatal care). She has the right to protection from domestic violence; against sexual harassment and rape; and against other forms of discrimination. Now I haven't asked her, but I am also fairly confident in saying that she is opposed to female genital mutilation.

This is feminism people. Say it all together now: FEM IN ISM. It won't hurt you. You won't sprout horns and spit fire, and your bras will not spontaneously combust.

Why are you so afraid of it?

From Rosie.com I copied the following:

Shirley Anita St. Hill Chisholm (November 30, 1924 – January 1, 2005) was an American politician, educator and author. She was a Congresswoman, representing New York’s 12th District for seven terms from 1968 to 1983. In 1968, she became the first African American woman elected to Congress. On January 23, 1972, she became the first major party African American candidate for President of the United States. She won 152 delegates.

• I was the first American citizen to be elected to Congress in spite of the double drawbacks of being female and having skin darkened by melanin. When you put it that way, it sounds like a foolish reason for fame. In a just and free society it would be foolish.
That I am a national figure because I was the first person in 192 years to be at once a congressman, black and a woman proves, I think, that our society is not yet either just or free.

• I want history to remember me not just as the first black woman to be elected to Congress, not as the first black woman to have made a bid for the presidency of the United States, but as a black woman who lived in the 20th century and dared to be herself.

• Of my two “handicaps” being female put more obstacles in my path than being black.

• I’ve always met more discrimination being a woman than being black.

unconscious mutterings

Paranormal :: psychology
Alarm :: clock
Operative :: undercover
Changing :: seasons
Framed :: for murder
Beer :: gross
Referral :: to a counselor
Unmasked :: batman
Movie star :: beverly hillbillies
Handbook :: residence handbook

In the City

I am in the city today for class and I noticed, there are a lot of clean cars here. More clean cars than at home.

Friday Fill In

1. Contact may cause my electrons to excite.
2. The parties hereto do mutually agree to enter into this contract.
3. Disney parks are magical.
4. Shower, food, some tv and sleep sounds really good right about now!
5. I positively need to do homework sooner.
6. Rainy days and Sundays always makes me smile :-) Wait, no, thats not right.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to getting home from work, tomorrow my plans include finally finishing my homework and Sunday, I want to take a nap!

thursday thirteen: things I love and hate about being in school

Thirteen Things about SCHOOL I am back in school after many years of being full time in the work force. i think if I ever had enough money to never work again I would go back to school full time and be a professional student. There are things I love and things I hate about being in school again. Here is my list for the week. 1. I love learning. 2. I love pens and pencils (especially) and paper and notebooks and erasers and ..... 3. I hate working in groups. I hated this as an undergrad also, and as a grad student I hate it equally (or more if that is possible). I don't like that the work, or lack of work, of others affects my grade. I am not all about the grade (no matter what you may think) but if I decide to do a half assed job of a task then I should get a grade that reflects that. If I want a good grade and someone in my group is a half asser, then I will do more work to compensate. I don't think that is fair and therefore I HATE group work. 4. I love being lectured to. My spouse likes classes that are all touchy feely and where people exchange ideas and talk about things and challenge one another. I don't. Give me the facts. Let me write them down. I am paying for someone more intelligent with more knowledge to impart that knowledge to me and I don't want someones ideas or feelings about it to interfere with my gleaning of that knowledge. 5. I love to sit in the back row. 6. I hate people who distract me, or the teacher, or get off topic to hear themselves speak. Just because I may APPEAR as though I am not paying attention (drawing, texting, searching the web in wireless internet) does NOT mean I am not paying attention and it is NOT an invitation to bother me! 7. I love textbooks. 8. I love homework (even though I never do it until the last minute, no matter how hard I try). 9. I love teachers - MOSTLY - unless they are boring, self-aggrandizing, or touchy feely. 10. I love syllabi, I love the details, I refer to my syllabi often. 11. Referring to #3 where I said I wasn't all about the grade. I do like grades, and I like to get good grades, but the grade isn't the be all and end all for me. I don't HAVE to get "a's" in every class and on every assignment, but I like being graded. I LOVE to get comments back on something I have worked on in order for me to know where I stand and how to make improvements if necessary. I used to get worked up if I feared I wasn't going to achieve perfection. I am much more relaxed about it now. I like to get my report card. 12. I love the comraderie. In the group I am in right now we are a cohort. The same group of people will be in every class until the end of the three yer course. There are personalities of course that do not get along, but there are some great people in the class and I am fortunate enough to have made some good friends. 13. Class presentations. I don't like to watch other presentations and I don't like being asked to participate in other group presentations. I will do it, but I don't like it. (Especially when the presentation does not follow the criteria given in the syllabi!) I don't have any problem at all giving a presentation though - and I follow what has been asked for!

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Ten things I am looking forward to in the spring

1. PRUNING!
2. My mom coming to visit us from South Africa.
3. Sunlight - this is significant because we live so far north there IS a difference in the amount of sunlight we recieve each day.
4. Cleaning up the yard of the new house.
5. Getting a tax refund (fingers crossed)and fixing the bathroom.
6. Spending time outside with the family.
7. Budding trees (pussy willows).
8. Opening up the quonset which was frozen shut then ploughed in behind a mound of snow.
9. No more dripping
10. Shedding my WINTER COAT!

34

meme

63%

unconscious mutterings

Homicide :: investigation
Divisive :: fighting
Flash :: Gordon
Steaming :: hot cocoa
Crunch :: Captain
Look out! :: heads up
Anticipating :: Butterflies
Slim :: Shady
Navel :: Orange
Help :: I need somebody

March Zuva

The word "Zuva" means sunshine. We named our puppy Zuva because she brought light back into our lives following the passing of our beloved Mukiwa.

In March the sun in Northern Alberta is higher in the sky and we are getting a lot more daylight. It feels as though we have come out of a long, dark, winter tunnel and I LOVE being in the sun again. The sun is out but our sunny puppy sure loves rolling in the snow. There's plenty left for her to roll in.

things I wont do

Since mothering M, I have found that my tolerance for all thinks "icky" has become quite well developed.
I was formerly squeemish. However, I have found that my love for the man makes moments when he holds out his grubby fingers, covered in slobber, with something to put in my mouth, endearing rather than revolting. I still can't stop to think about it too long or I have to turn away, but I do manage to eat a lot of things he offers, most things in fact.
I can
1. eat from his fingers
2. share my drink cup with him
3. change his diaper even though he waits for the most opportune "wiping" moment and rolls away from me
4. kiss his open mouth - which he now offers for kisses at bedtime

and yet... there is still a "LINE" which I cannot approach.
We bathe together nightly and he recently pooped in the tub. Pooped. Fecal matter.
At the first sight of the offending floater, this mom is OUT of there.

Just like they tell you on an airline when giving directions for using oxygen masks in case of emergency. Take care of yourself first and the children afterwards. I am getting the HECK out of dodge and when I have come to my faculties I rescue M from fecal water.

List # 4: Cafe Writing: Seven people who have influenced me.

I checked out Cafe Writing for the first time tonight. I had really wanted to do a month full of lists (challenge from NaBloPoMo) and I just am dragging this month. Tonight I am going to incorporate the Cafe Writing Challenge with my list challenge.

Here is my list of Seven People Who Have Influenced Me.

1. Kathleen L. - I don't know that she would really want her full name here, so I am editing a bit. Kathleen is who I consider to be my mentor and has been extremely influential in my professional life. I sought employment in the field I am currently employed in because of a desire to emulate her. She was/is a university administrator who has "semi resigned" to teach instead of "administer". She is highly intelligent, thoughtful, kind and someone I would like to be exactly like some day. She has helped me navigate some tough situations in my professional life and gives sage advise.
2. Gran Ennis. When I was four years old my great grandmother made me feel as though I was the most important person in the world to her. She was interested in me, in what I was interested in, and in giving her time to making memories with me. She was an amazing woman and I have wonderful memories of her.
3. My mother. A while ago - in November - I blogged about my mother on my original blog. Please click HERE to see what I wrote about here then.
4. My extremely handsome brother Justin, whom I also wrote about HERE.
5. Mukiwa. Technically Muk is not a "person" but a dog. She was our pet for five years and recently lost her fight with hip dysplasia and was put to sleep. But she influenced me. She was my driving companion. My working companion. She used to get SO very excited when I cam home from work that she ran in circles over the road and under the culvert and she brought a smile to my face every day when I arrived home. I miss her desperately and the unconditional love she offered in my imperfect life.
6. Shel. My spouse of 11 years. I have written about Shel here, and here.
7. E. B. When I was 20 years old she kissed me. I had never been kissed by a woman and at the same time that I was thrilled beyond measure and TOTALLY in love, I was terrified by the thought of all it meant for my future, my religion and my parents dreams for me.

girafffe list for S

Today we were in another small community where one of our former foster daughters' has returned to live with her mom.
S was a ray of sunshine in our home and we miss her dreadfully. When she left we didn't get everything belonging to her packed up and as laundry loads were completed and we packed up to move we put a box together of things that belonged to her that we needed to return.
Since she has been back with her mom we have visited twice. Once we stopped by and dropped some things off and they were not home. Today was the third time we have stopped by since she returned home in September 2007. When Shel went to the door there was some discussion about wether it was a good idea to visit or not. Mom's new boyfriend expressed that S became very upset following our visits... so we won't do it again. (We don't have a phone number to call in advance or we would call first)
We took the things into the house and S wanted to show me her bedroom.
If I had giraffe money I would buy the following things for S anonymously - so her mom and boyfriend don't feel bad - and because of all the kids in the world, this one should be surrounded by the things that bring her joy.

1. Princess sheets
2. Princess curtains
3. Princess quilt
4. Canopy bed
5. Pink wall paint for her bedroom
6. Princess towel
7. A castle dollhouse
8. A dress up closet with lots of tiaras, feather boas, high heeled shoes and earrings.

ten on tuesday: ten favorite drinks

Here is my list from Ten on Tuesday:

Ten favorite drinks

1. Dr. Pepper. I prefer the American recipe to the Canadian one, but I'll make do!
2. Lipton Raspberry Iced Tea. Recently we can't find this in stores - of course.
3. Water. I had to throw this in because I do drink water on occasion.
4. Ruby Red Grapefruit
5. Rooibos. I drank this growing up, LONG before it gained it's current popularity.
6. Coke is it.
7. Cream Soda. Especially from South Africa (green cream soda) when my parents bring it. I also like cream soda candies.
8. Chocolate Milk. I don't like plain milk. I like chocolate milk and even strawberry milk on occasion. Quik - if available
9. Orange juice
10. Apple juice

Friday fill in

I know I am way late for this but it's been so long since I blogged I am catching up!

1. I'm looking forward to things in our lives calming down next week.
2. I don't handle people around me being sick very well.
3. Peanut M&M's are something I could eat every day.
4. Warmth and sunlight make my spouse VERY happy.
5. Disneyworld (hopefully)here I come!
6.I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE and want LOTS more tattoo(s).
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to finishing all the room assessments I need to for the check in Sunday, tomorrow my plans include hanging with Shel all day in the hospital and Sunday, I want to watch some good tv after picking up Max!

unconscious mutterings

1.Chemical :: my chemical romance
2.Poker :: face

3.Federal :: reserve

4.Mattress :: king sized ... LOVE IT!
5.Who am I? :: Who are you?
6.Investigation :: Murder
7.In good hands :: granny B being cared for by Aunty Bren
8.8:30 :: Good t.v. starts in 30 minutes
9.Creditors:: Hate them. Hate knowing who they are. Hate ever having had a call from one.
10.Resource :: townhouse (at work)

list #1 "stickers"

Last year I participated in the blog a day every day for the month of November from the website Nablopomo.

This same website is now posting a month to month challenge starting with the Month of March.
I was planning on participating in this months challenge and yesterday I missed day number one which excludes me from the "official" participation list, but I am going to go ahead and continue with my monthly postings anyway.

The theme for the month of March is "lists". I must post one list every day for the entire month. Today I will post two lists.

Here is my list numero uno.

This week at work I have been doing room assessments. I carry a clipboard to write these assessments on. When I was working as a "tracker", tracking kids on house arrest, I carried the same clipboard. I have had it now for a LONG time and it is covered with stickers.
Here is a list of some of the stickers on my clipboard.

1. Big Bird
2. Mickey Mouse with a soccer ball (x2)
3. Vans
4. AAA fasten seatbelts
5. del Monte - Equador
6. Horseshoe
7. Seatbelt warning
8. Wile E. Coyote
9. dinosaur
10. Lightening bolt
11. Cat in the Hat
12. Scooby Doo
13. Coca Cola
14. 2 beavers
15. 2 ladybugs
16 heart
17. Ying/Yang

it still happens

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYLbYMS2KcA

Thursday Feb 28

Shel is in the hospital. She was admitted yesterday for what the doc said was an acute cardiac event (I think?) My brain seems to not be functioning well and I am not remembering critical information. (I also forgot to take M's Epi pen to the babysitter).

While I am worried for Shel I am relieved (?) that the doc saw she needed to have some kind of intervention for her blood pressure and admitted her to the hospital. I hope this will bring some answers to the medical problems she has been facing and she will see some improvements in how she feels as a result of all this.

I am somewhat of a workaholic. Under the best of circumstances I can easily work too much, too long and sacrifice family time and personal time for work. It is something I have always done and in times of stress I seem to do it more. I don't know what it is about sitting in a hospital room that makes me want to run to work. Yes, to work. Maybe it is getting lost in the familiar? A distraction? Feeling as if I have control over something? Feeling as though I am accomplishing something? Since sitting in a hospital room I don't feel any of those things.

This morning I got a call from one of the ladies whom I supervise and she called to say she was unable to cover her shift today because she had a medical appointment. Here I sit covering her shift. I don't know why, in my head, my medical emergency is less important than her medical appointment, or if I just need an excuse to say " I HAVE to be at work today ..." really I need no excuse. Even if I don't like the things that are happening at work I get some kind of sick comfort out of it. The same can be said for school. I feel like I HAVE to be there. I let my group and teacher know I would not be in GP for the Friday portion of my class. Missing class gives me anxiety, I am trying to convince myself I am NOT "needed" there and that I won't miss anything critical.

RIP Sadee

This is Sadee as a puppy. She and Muk were best of friends. They went to puppy training together and hung out. Last week Sadee was put to rest following the discovery of cancer throughout her body.
I hope she and Muk have rejoined one another in a happier place.
RIP Sadee
Our love and thoughts to Steve and Loralee at this most painful time.

Ten on Tuesday

Ten Movies I have intended to watch but haven't.

1. Sicko
2. Cars
3. Ratatouille
4. Juno
5. Jumper
6. The Bucket List
7. Walk the Line ( I can't decide if I actually want to see this or not)
8. 300 (I have mixed feelings on this one also, but it was on my list to see so I am including it for now)
9.Caramel
10. Fool's Gold

Wordless Wednesday

BROTHERS

Unconscious mutterings

1. Protocol :: Lcok down
   
2. Girlfriends: making out
   
3. Shoulders :: to cry on
   
4. Coming home :: Ozzy Ozbourne
   
5. Let it in :: fresh air
   
6. Honor :: Among Thieves
   
7. Tyler :: F.
   
8. Thriller :: Micheal Jackson
   
9. Angela:: I girl I knew in school
   
10. The winner is :: ME! at the bonspiel Karaokee :)

http://subliminal.lunanina.com/

Thursday Thirteen: songs I will download

I got all excited about NaBloPoMo monthly challenge for March. NaBloPoMo USED to be about blogging every day for the month of November. Now the challenge has been extended on a monthly basis and the topic for March is "LISTS".

I'm a good list maker. I can make lists that would amaze you - unless lists DON'T amaze you, then you would just think I was a bit of a freak - like my spouse thinks. However, I am excited to do the list a day for the month of March and in my excitement I think I have had some kind of a brain freeze on topics to write about here for the rest of the month. I have been pretty busy at work which makes a difference to how much energy I have for blogging. The busier I am the less energy I have to write something riveting. (assuming anything I write is riveting)

I thought I would make Thursday 13 be about how many unique ways I can procrastinate, then I realized I don't want to reveal myself TOO much to the three people who might read this blog because if I wrote about how I procrastinate then every time they ever see me they with think " Ah HAH, Julie is procrastinating again." Maybe they already know I am?

I'm not feeling hugely motivated right now but I did promise my spouse I would blog today so here goes my thirteen for today. if this works how I want it to you should be able to click on each one for a link to the utube video of each song.

13 songs (out of THOUSANDS) I will download to my mp3 player when I stop procratinating it ...

1. Outkast "Hey Ya"
2. Black Eyed Peas "Where is the Love"
3. Beth Hart "LA song"
4. KT Tunstall "Black Horse and the Cherry Tree"
5. Godsmack "Voodoo"
6. Plain White T's "Hey There Delilah"
7. Rob Thomas "Now Comes the Night"
8. Daughtry "Over You"
9. Sean Paul "Get Busy"
10. Matchbox20 "3am"
11. Toad the Wet Sprocket "Throw it All Away"
12. Indigo Girls "Last Tears"
13. Dave Matthews Band "Ants Marching"

17 months old today

Hey there my main man.

Today you are 17 months old. It's hard to believe you have been here for so long already. I still feel sleep deprived from the first months after you came home from the hospital but you are a GREAT night sleeper (when Helios is not opening your bedroom door and sneaking into your crib for nightly play sessions). I have had a few days off this week and you have almost driven me completely whacko. You want to communicate with us so much but not matter how hard I try I CANNOT UNDERSTAND what you are screaming about. So you scream some more. I DO understand the screams of frustration and this week I have wanted to join you. Screaming. In frustration. And then you smile.

Yesterday your mom and I went into town to the grocery store. You are so curious looking at everything and everyone and you were GREAT sitting in the cart almost the whole time - usually you get bored very quickly and try to stand up in the seat. On our way out of the store I was pulling the cart and mom was holding you - you had both hands on the handle of the cart and you were "pushing". Oh you LAUGHED. a deep down, gutteral laugh that had your mom and I laughing right along with you. You have such a beautiful smile and you laugh a lot. Thank goodness those moments of laughter can make me forget the screaming --temporarily.

Today we had a lady come over from Early Intervention. She did a "short" assessment on you because we have been worried about your screaming and your lack of eye contact. Of course from the moment she arrived you were looking at her right in the eyes and I don't think you screamed once. It was nice to hear that she thinks you are on track with your development (other than your speech) and she is giving us a referral to the speech therapist for you.

You are fiercely independent I am already having nightmares about what is in store for us as you grow older. You show your intelligence every moment by picking up on the things that we do and mimicing us and constantly exploring your world. it is a joy to watch you with the pets. Tora is your very best friend and your mom and I are stunned that Nyx and Helios don't go running whenever you walk into the room. Your expressions of love for them are not so gentle, we are still working on it with you and they are extremely patient.

Last night for the first time in a LONG time you woke up with a night terror. Your mom and I both came to you to make sure you were ok and you lay in my arms while your mom went to get you a new bottle. You are SO tall already, you barely fit in my arms. You are growing so fast. It was wonderful to hold you and rock you.

Sleep well baby of mine. Rest your head close to my heart, never to part, baby of mine.

The Translator: BOOK

I was completely captivated by the story told by Daoud Hari in his book " The Translator".

His writing was straightforward and concise. I read the entire book in just two days and passed it on to my spouse to read. Some of his descriptions of the atrocities he encountered are shocking and completely mind blowing. In contrast to the book I previously completed (Eat, Pray, Love) I was moved by the plight of the millions of displaced Sudanese currently living in refugee camps, unable to work and in dire need of appropriate food and shelter.

At the conclusion of the book Daoud has printed the Universal declaration of Human Rights. I am ashamed to say that I have not read this declaration prior to my reading of this book. I was interested to see how many "democratic" countries do not follow the articles which were accepted by the United Nations in 1948.

I think this book is a "must read" which I will highly recommend to others.

Eat, Pray, Love : BOOK

I just completed "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert.
It has been on my list of books to read for quite a while and last week when I was at school I came across it in paperback at Costco and couldn't resist.

The novel is divided into three "books", each book one part of the personal journey of the writer.
The first book is about Italy. I was immediately captured by the writers style and humor and didn't put it down - until I reached book 2. The second part of the journey is to India where the author "pursues devotion" living in an Ashram. It was here that she lost me.

I managed to finish the book but I found the last two books to be tedious and a chore. I was completely uninterested in her personal journey to find the divine, her struggle with meditation and chanting, and her "preachiness". Completely uninterested. I was also offended by the fact that this woman leaves everything in New York to travel overseas to "find herself". I think it was a journey of the elite. It was an unreachable journey for the "everyday" person living in the USA who finds themselves in painful circumstances.

The last part of the writers journey takes her to Bali where she pursues "balance".
I would have thought that this part of the story would have captured my interest again because I am very interested in the concept of balance and how to find it. I didn't find any balance in this book.

The writers style didn't change, and honestly I liked her style of writing. I simply found the book a little to "self aggrandizing" and presumptuous. I thought the author was preachy in parts and that turned me off also. Right after I read this book I read a memoir about a man from Darfur. As I read his account of his life I was further turned off by a woman with money to burn who took months and months to "find herself" and preach to me.

This was not at all what I expected from the book and that made it even more of a disappointment. Unfortunately I won't recommend this book to anyone (not that it needs my endorsement!)

888 update

non-fiction (used to be autobiography/biography)
1. Measure of a Man. Sidney Poitier
2. Animal, Vegetable, Miracle. Barbara Kingsolver
3. A Long Way Gone. Ishmael Beah
4. Spycatcher. Peter Wright
5. The Places in Between. Rory Stewart (completed January 19th 2008)
6. Infidel. Ayaan hirsi Ali
7. Glass Castle.
8. Fish:

Young Adult Fiction
1. The Canning Season. Polly Horvath
2. Godless. Pete Hautman
3. Autobiography of my Dead Brother. Walter Dean Myers
4. The Invention of Hugo Cabret. Brian Selznick
5.
6.
7.
8.

Pulitzer Prize Winners
1. Middlesex. Jeffrey Eugenides (Completed January 21st 2008)
2. Gilead. Marilynne Robinson (Completed January 13th 2008)
3. The Known World. (currently reading)
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.

From the NYT Bestseller list. (I don't want to limit myself to books that have already been written. There might be some good ones published this year)
1. Bleeding Kansas. Sarah Paretsky. #15 January 13 2008
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.

Banned or "challenged" books
1. Go Ask Alice
2. The Lorax.
3. The Well of Lonliness
4. Steal This Book. Abbie Hofmann
5.
6.
7.
8.


Books already on my Bookshelf
1. I am counting these three books as one. They were already on my shelf and I had never read them but they are young adult books (and totally predictable).
Gordon Korman. Island: Book one "Shipwreck" (completed February 1 2008)
Gordon Korman. Island: Book two "Survival" (completed February 1 2008)
Gordon Korman. Island: Book Three "Escape" (completed February 1 2008)
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.


School reading assignments
I am back in school and I have readings I am assigned to do throughout the term. I know that each of them is not a "book" but there will a lot more than 8 of them over the course of the year. Since I have to do the reading for class I will keep track of it here because having it be a part of this process will be added motivation for me to actually read the stuff.
1. Campus response to a student gunman. Asmussen K. & Creswell, J. (1995) 16 pages. Completed January 11 2008
2. Motivation of parent involvement in secondary-level schooling. Bertrand, R. & Deslandes, R. (2005) 11 pages. Completed January 11 2008
3. Constructions of survival and coping by women who have survived childhood sexual abuse. Morrow, S. & Smith, M. 20 pages. Completed February 7 2008
4. Enlightenment in chemical dependency treatment programs: a grounded theory. Feen-Calligan (199) 14 pages. Completed February 7 2008
5. Reflecting on columbine high:Ideologies of privilege in "standardized" schools. Tonso, K. (2002) 14 pages. Completed February 7 2008


Books on my "to be read" list.
1. Saturday. Ian McEwan (completed January 27 2007)
2. Eat, Pray, Love. Elizabeth Gilbert (completed February 16 2008)
3. The Translator: A Tribesman's Memoir of Darfur. Daoud Hari (completed February 18 2008)
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.

Unconscious Mutterings

1. Passport :: international travel ...YAY!
   
2. Small world :: after all. It's a small world after all...
   
3. Radio :: NPR
4. Marine ::Biology
5. Wall :: Berlin Wall
   
6. Wanna be :: rich
   
7. Pigtails :: me 25 years ago
   
8. Hyphen :: punctuation
   
9. 9.99 :: 1
   
10. Unrated :: unedited
    

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Friday Fill in

1. Snowdrops are small and white, clean and bright, (just like edelweiss.)
2. I'm going to set up my PS2 so i can play some games I got for Christmas.
3. Suddenly (by Soraya) is a song whose lyrics have meaning to me.
4. Just one sip and I can tell it's not American Dr. Pepper.
5. Deep in a good book or working on a cross stitch is where I'm happiest.
6. I believe that Mexican food is a necessary part of life.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to finishing a book, tomorrow my plans include starting to read a new book and Sunday, I want to nap!

Thursday Thirteen: favorite romantic gestures

Thirteen Things about my favorite romantic gestures My favorite romantic gestures ... because my spousal unit posted hers 1. Cooking with onions (because she hates them so) 2. Holding hands. This is how we first "got together" and I love the reminder - also because we really don't hold hands in public because we somewhat fear being bashed, so when we do hold hands "I like it a lot" 3. Walking together at night on the golf course in the summer 4. Kick butt Easter baskets 5. Putting lotion on my elbows. I am not good at the putting on of lotion. I simply don't take the time to do it. I have crackly elbows and she takes care of them for me 6. Buying me roses on the opening night of my acting debut. This is a bigger deal than it seems because we live in a teeny northern Canadian town, with not a lot of access to fresh flowers in the dead of winter 7. Packing food for road trips, and packing my bag for me when I go to school. I need to track down the picture we took in the U-Haul when we left for our trip up here and scan it in so I can show you. Man there was a LOT of good food, and she always packs my favorites! 8. Letting me win at scrabble 9. Laughing at my jokes 10. Letting me take naps in the afternoon on the weekend when technically it is my time to be hanging with 17 month old M 11. Coming with me to the great white north where we needed to relocate in order to preserve our relationship (the grand ol' US of A would not allow a multinational gay couple to stay together legally - even if we WANTED to contribute to taxes etc!) 12. Watching "Set it off" with me in the theater all alone and not walking away thinking I was a whacko when I couldn't stop SOBBING. 13. Sitting on the toilet (with the seat down - DUR) when M and I bath. I know at the end of a long day the last thing she wants to do is watch me play in the tub with the Maxster, so I love it when she comes and chats with me as we splash

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Wordless Wednesday

unconscious mutterings

Score :: GGGGOOOOOALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!
Luxurious :: Sheets
Party :: All the time, party all the time. My girl wants to party all the time.
Limited edition :: expensive
Security :: Breach
Betty :: Rubble
Under construction :: Roads in Alberta
Pest :: Control
Director :: Ridley Scott
Express ::Mail is expensive and notvery fast

Friday Fill in

1. I'm looking forward to temperatures that are not in the MINUS FORTY range.
2. Morocco is a place I always wanted to visit and haven't made it there yet.
3. I've fallen in love with my baby boy's smile.
4. Six of one, half a dozen of the other.
5. Addiction to food makes me fat.
6. I crack myself up!
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to finishing my homework, tomorrow my plans include having a hotdog at Costco and Sunday, I want to read and take a nap!

giving up "hope" for lent

So it's Lent.
I missed my FAVORITE holiday of the year - Fat Tuesday - and I have no excuse.
Obviously it is not my favorite holiday or I would have remembered it, but I think it's cool to have a holiday dedicated ENTIRELY to gorging yourself before fasting.
So Lent. I am not Catholic, but every year I give up something for Lent. Every year I give up the SAME thing for lent. HOPE.
That's right, I give up hope for 40 days out of the year. I could probably give it up for more than that, but I try to limit myself.
I would write more on the topic, but I am in despair right now so I have to sign off and get me some chocolate. That's why I can't give up chocolate - how would I get through having no hope if I couldn't bury the pain in chocolate.
(I will just say this. Mitt Romney withdrew from the republican race for candidacy and that ALMOST dragged me RIGHT back into having hope again after I had given it up. I had to fight myself to maintain my hopelessness, but that's what lent is about - effort.)

weather request

This is the picnic table where we sit for coffee break in the summer at work.

I'd like to put in a weather request.
I know I have chosen to live in the north with my family and part of living in the north means cold winters.
I don't hate winter. I like snow because it covers up the ugly brown of death following the fall, but can we PLEASE get an increase in temperature? We are currently sitting at -23 degrees celcius (around -9 degrees F). Because the wind never stops blowing, the actual temperature is colder than that. A few weeks ago the temperature was -53 degrees F.
We have been very lucky this winter because we moved out to an acreage with a LONG driveway and we don't have any snow removal implements other than shovels. We have some contractors using our yard for their staging area while they do work on a bridge by our house and they have been great about ploughing out our driveway. A couple of times I would not have made it out of the yard for DAYS without their help. Shovelling snow when it is -23 (or colder) takes a very long time and energy - neither of which I have much of.
It is snowing now. The snow can come, but PLEASE PLEASE can we get some warmer air up this way?

Thursday Thirteen: things in my office

Here are 13 things that are in my office right now:

Some plants.

A jar of coins

A goofy punching bag

An Ozzy Bobblehead

Stapler and hole puncher (which I could not do without)

A mickey mouse can

A watering can

A bong - which I confiscated (it does not belong to me.... well, I guess it does now!)

A poster about something near and dear to my heart. (Neve Campbell)

My africa carving

A coke ad

A dog toy. (yes, it is called "heave a beaver, but that's not ENTIRELY why I have it)

A buddha.

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Who would you vote for in the USA election?

http://www.wqad.com/Global/link.asp?L=259460
The WQAD candidate survey is based on the original SELECT A CANDIDATE survey developed by Minnesota Public Radio and posted at: http://minnesota.publicradio.org/projects/ongoing/select_a_candidate/.

I took this survey because my spouse did. I lived in the USA for a lot of years and because I was not a citizen I was not permitted to vote. While I was there I felt somehwat detatched from the electoral process and to be honest I didn't follow politics too closely, other than immigration laws, which never did consider me as a potential legitimate immigrant.

I was so naive to politics that I was shocked to realize how politically slanted the different news broadcasts were. This came to my attention when my in-laws were staying with us. My MIL would watch the news, talk to the newscasters as though they were listening to her, and she AGREED with what they were saying. That's when I knew something was amiss. My mother in law and I can agree on ..... Oh right, NOTHING. For example, she managed to argue with me ona topic I was AGREEING with her on! I literally had to stop and say to her in the middle of a conversation "You know we are saying EXACTLY the same thing here don't you?" She just thought because I was opening my mouth and noise was coming out that I was therefore diametrically opposed to her.

Now I live with my family in Canada, where we can live LEGALLY as a married couple, and where I could sponsor my spouse for landed immigrant status. Now that my family is directly and constantly affected by the decisions made by politicians I tend to follow politics, even (especially) local politics, more closely.

I have been watching with interest the unfolding of the elections this year in the USA. I have also learned that while I no longer live there, many decisions made in the US still affect me.
My spousal unit and I differ in our political outlook. (WHA? such a shocker!) She is a radical libertarian feminist. I am a conservative. Well, ok, as much as I CAN be conservative considering I am also a dyke. (dyke and conservative are not two words which go typically alongside one another in the same sentence)

I used to think that feminism was a dirty word. I believe in the death penalty - in some cases. But I do watch CNN (or as my spousal unit's parets refer to it "the communist news network".)
So as we have been watching the democratic debates and following the political races currently ongoing, we have numerous discussions about who we would support and why. I have been a supporter of Obama since the very beginning and of course, my spousal unit supports Hillary Clinton. I took this test tonight and what do you know? I have more ISSUE similarities with Hillary than I do with Barack Obama. That's what it's all about folks. Issues. I'm going to have to get over my conflict with feminism I think.

Know your issues.

Regardless who leads the democratic posrty to this election, it will be a historic event and one I am thrilled to see in my lifetime. Rock the vote!

Partners in Crime

It may look very innocent but it is not. These two have partnered up and planned late night crib rendezvous. Helios has figured out some way to open Max's door from the outside and join him in the crib. He waits until the witching hour when all the family is dead to the world and then makes his sneak attack. He climbs into the crib with Max and wakes him up and then they start to play. Max of course gets carried away and even though I am certain Helios attempts to keep him quiet he cannot help but let a squeal of joy escape. Since he has learned the art of stealth from me - and therefore CANNOT be quiet no matter how he tries, he wakes up the whole house with his laughter.

They are punks. Both of them.

As a result of this little 3am tete a tete, everyone else in the entire house is exhausted. They think it is the "cats meow." They can't wait to do it again.

WHO ME?

888 update

non-fiction (used to be autobiography/biography)
1. Measure of a Man. Sidney Poitier
2. Animal, Vegetable, Miracle. Barbara Kingsolver
3. A Long Way Gone. Ishmael Beah
4. Spycatcher. Peter Wright
5. The Places in Between. Rory Stewart (completed January 19th 2008)
6. Infidel. Ayaan hirsi Ali
7. Glass Castle.
8. Fish:

Young Adult Fiction
1. The Canning Season. Polly Horvath
2. Godless. Pete Hautman
3. Autobiography of my Dead Brother. Walter Dean Myers
4. The Invention of Hugo Cabret. Brian Selznick
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Pulitzer Prize Winners
1. Middlesex. Jeffrey Eugenides (Completed January 21st 2008)
2. Gilead. Marilynne Robinson (Completed January 13th 2008)
3. The Known World. (currently reading)
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From the NYT Bestseller list. (I don't want to limit myself to books that have already been written. There might be some good ones published this year)
1. Bleeding Kansas. Sarah Paretsky. #15 January 13 2008
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Banned or "challenged" books
1. Go Ask Alice
2. The Lorax.
3. The Well of Lonliness
4. Steal This Book. Abbie Hofmann
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Books already on my Bookshelf
1. I am counting these three books as one. They were already on my shelf and I had never read them but they are young adult books (and totally predictable).
Gordon Korman. Island: Book one "Shipwreck" (completed February 1 2008)
Gordon Korman. Island: Book two "Survival" (completed February 1 2008)
Gordon Korman. Island: Book Three "Escape" (completed February 1 2008)
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School reading assignments
I am back in school and I have readings I am assigned to do throughout the term. I know that each of them is not a "book" but there will a lot more than 8 of them over the course of the year. Since I have to do the reading for class I will keep track of it here because having it be a part of this process will be added motivation for me to actually read the stuff.
1. Campus response to a student gunman. Asmussen K. & Creswell, J. (1995) 16 pages. Completed January 11 2008
2. Motivation of parent involvement in secondary-level schooling. Bertrand, R. & Deslandes, R. (2005) 11 pages. Completed January 11 2008
3. Constructions of survival and coping by women who have survived chilhood sexual abuse. Morrow, S. & Smith, M. 20 pages.
4. Enlightenment in chemical dependency treatment programs: a grounded theory. Feen-Calligan (199) 14 pages.
5. Reflecting on columbine high:Ideologies of privilege in "standardized" schools. Tonso, K. (2002) 14 pages.


Books on my "to be read" list.
1. Saturday. Ian McEwan (completed January 27 2007)
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Karma

I have a really good relationship with my brother and his wife. When I moved back to Canada they graciously opened their home to me and let me stay for three months while I looked for work and a place to live and bring my family to. It was a huge sacrifice on their part, they were fairly newlywed and my sister in law was pregnant with their first child. She had never met me and my brother and I had not lived under the same roof since I had been in high school - a long time ago.

We hit it off famously. I am so very glad we were able to spend that time together as it forged for us a bond which has lasted to this day. My brother and I bonded over movies and soccer games and being "siblings" again. My sister in law and I bonded over being two women in a house with one man. Now unfortunately we live over five hours away from one another and we miss being able to hang out. The best part of it was we didn't have ONE argument. I am pretty certain that others in my immediate family are stunned over this. I think it's kind of funny. We are all very strong minded, very opinionated adults and we managed to make the time together a wonderful one, with NO exceptions.

J2 (my bro) and his wife have moved recently into a new home and they now have a yard and a space for a DOG!

All of our growing up years we have had dogs. J2 has always been the most devoted to the pets, he just loves them. Of all 5 kids, he is the most gentle, most natural "dog" person. Since he has been married, he and his wife have lived in apartments and townhomes and other non-dog allowing places. They have always planned that once they move into their own home they will get a dog.

Earlier this week I was talking to my sister in law on the phone. She is also a pet lover and a rescuer of pets, not unlike my spouse. She has been watching news on tv of local shelters having to put down animals from being overcrowded and she has been trying to convince J2 that they should adopt a dog sooner than the original plan of this upcoming summer. J2 has managed to stay firmly attached to his decision of waiting until it is warmer. Des had some blankets and other supplies to drop off at the local animal shelter and J2 (wisely) instructed her (firmly) to stay away from the shelters! He knows she would not be able to resist bringing home an addition to the family. While we were talking I told Des that training a puppy to use the bathroom outside is easier in the winter than in the summer, because the dogs will go to the bathroom sooner in the cold. She passed on my suggestion to J2 and he suggested in return that I jump in a frozen lake! He does not want to train a dog in the wintertime - especially since temperatures this week have plummeted to below 40 degrees and colder.

Fast forward to last night. When I go to school I have to travel to another town. A friend in class has graciously opened her home to me to stay at when I travel, saving me the cost of a hotel room every two weeks. A few weeks ago I offered to her that if she ever needed us to help her out in any way we would be more than happy to. This week she asked us to keep her two dogs for a week while she travelled out of the province. Of course we were happy to oblige, and I promptly forgot she was coming. Shel called me last night at work to let me know our guests had arrived. Odie (an older and very gentle dog) and Fozzie(a german Shepherd PUPPY less than 3 months old) were making themselves at home.

When I got home after midnight it was my turn to take the puppies to the bathroom. Our two dogs are very familiar with the routine - I go to the door, open it, let them out and in a few minutes let them back in. With two new dogs in the mix this is not a good idea at midnight. We live on an acreage and I didn't want "roaming" dogs who didn't know me at all and therefore may not answer me when I called them. I let our dogs out first, then I had to dress and go out one at a time with Odie and Foz.
My theory on how dogs will go to the bathroom quicker in the cold ..... not true. My theory that dogs who don't know me from Adam won't come when I call them ... true. The temperature last night, a balmy -28 degrees celcius.

The puppy slept in his own crate brought from home and he cried all night. I got up twice to take him to the bathroom and both times had to totally dress and go outside. It was cold. He didn't get any quicker as the night went on.

My brother - he's a smart dude.