When someone comments on your blog...

In 2008 I posted a short blog about synchronized swimming and the olympics. This week someone commented on my post. I will copy here both the blog post and the comment:

Here is my post from 2008:

The 2008 Olympics started today. I love the Olympics. I love to watch a lot of sports, and I particularly enjoy watching the Olympics. Some of the sports I take more pleasure in watching and I honestly don't watch them all. One sport which makes me laugh is synchronized swimming. Don't get me wrong, I can appreciate the athleticism of these ladies (why are they always ladies?)



I once went to deep water aqua size and I had an asthma attack, swallowed water and almost drowned "WITH" a floatation device on trying to kick and lift my shoulders above the water. I know these swimmers are athletes. I laugh though because really - the glitter and noseplugs?

Here is the comment posted this week:

1. noseclips are necessary. how about you go and try to flip upside down in the water, see how fun getting it up your nose is for you. 2) ....? how does glitter make an incredibly difficult sport "funny". is it "funny" to you that these girls work their asses of? is it "funny" that they sacrifice all the normal pleasures of life to train? is it "funny" that, even while performing these incredibly difficult, taxing movements, they have the sheer control and willpower to keep a smile on their face and their eyes open to maintain the entertainment factor of the sport (because nobody wants to see gasping, grimacing swimmers)? i don't think it's funny, and moreover, i think it is highly ignorant and downright disrespectful of you to mock what these girls have given everything for just because their outfits sparkle and they put on a smile for spectators such as yourself. not so funny.


I don't know about you but I thought the reaction was a bit over the top. I certainly believe that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, however I thought my posting was pretty clear that I recognized the athleticism of the swimmers. I didn't think what I said was disrespectful and I stand by it - I remain amused by the whole event. Is being amused disrespectful? Has anyone else ever had a reaction to a post that you thought was "over the top"?

How do you react to them?

original song - get it right

I know for some people the thought of watching Glee is as painful as pulling teeth. (getting teeth pulled is painful as I can attest to today)
Knowing that there are people out there who wouldn't normally check out Glee, but still have an appreciation for good music, I am posting this original song, written for the show, which I think is worth a listen.
Check it out!

Http://www.youtu.be/Mb7dyVtdRlg

things that make me smile (and maybe even cry a little)

This is a television moment that I love. Whether you are a fan of Rosie O'Donnell or not it is worth watching to see the joy. It's long - about 8 minutes, but worth every one.



Have you done anything recently to bring joy to another person?
I tried to today!

Carol Lynn Pearson

One of my all time favorite poets is Carol Lynn Pearson. In my own mind I like to think we are connected. She is close to someone who is close to my family. In my imagination, we are friends.

She is Mormon and long before I was "out" I was captivated by her poetry. I felt as though the words she wrote were meant specifically for me and I cannot even count the times that I was comforted, or uplifted, or motivated, or inspired by her words.

In my REAL life I am no longer affiliated with the Mormon church. In my REAL life I have pain as a result of my former affiliation with the Mormon church. Pain in the relationship with my mother (and she has pain also).

I have mentioned before that I love my mom. Please don't ever think for a moment that I don't. And still there is pain in that relationship. Pain born of my homosexuality and my mother's religious beliefs.

You might ask - how did I get "here" from a blog in which I began posting about Carol Lynn Pearson. Well. She is Mormon, and a mother, and intimate with the topic of the church and homosexuality. She has this idea, called Proposition Healing to increase love and hope "Breaking Bread and Building Understanding" for Mormons and Gays.

In my imaginary world, this friend of a friend is a path to a connection, a healing, with my own mother.

Here is one of her poems:

UNFED


We feed one another in rations,
Serve affection measured to
The minimum daily requirement,
The very acceptable least--


While love bursts the walls
Of our larder,
Wondering, amazed,
Why we are afraid
To feast.

Adapting

Shel and I were talking the other night about how different our lives are now from what we have envisioned for ourselves growing up. Though we both wanted children, neither of us ever really "saw" ourselves parenting because of the difficulty it is to have children when you are lesbian.

Now that we have children we have to adapt again, this time because we have two boys with special needs.

One of the issues with both our boys involves sensory integration disorder. Sensory integration disorder is a neurological disorder that affects the ability to organize sensory information for use by the brain. Someone with S.I.D. has an inability to organize sensory information as it comes in through the senses. This is expressed differently for every person with the disorder. Our youngest has Oral Input Dysfunction (among others). What this means for him is that he is hypersensitive to oral input. He has difficulty chewing and even though he just turned two he still only eat "soft" or pureed foods. He gags with textured foods - and sometimes he gags for what appears to be "no" reason. He is highly resistant to having any dental work done - or to using a toothbrush. He LOVES toothbrushes though, but mostly uses them to clean the sink!

Yesterday was his birthday and his brother and I made him a "happy cake". When I got home from work we iced it and covered it with teeny tiny multi coloured sprinkles. Then we sang happy birthday to him and ate cake. I should say "tried to eat cake".

Part of S.I.D. is constantly finding new things about your child. I discovered yesterday that those tiny sprinkles make my baby gag. I will admit, it was kind of funny because he wanted SO much to eat the icing, but every time he put his finger into the icing and into his mouth - he gagged.

I have to separate myself a little from this whole thing because it can be easy to start to feel defeated by it. I wanted to do something special for him and it turned out it wasn't so special after all. We adapted, we took the sprinkles off and he ate some happy cake. It just wasn't what I thought it would be for him. I have to look at it as a learning experience and in the future we will have happy cake sans sprinkles!

I think what I fear the most is that if I spend so much time "learning", will my boys have wonderful childhoods or just feel like experiments?

Palin

I spent some time watching the vice presidential debates and I was struck by the communication "STYLE" which Palin adopted. I know that all politicians do it, but Mrs. Palin was blatant in her avoidance of questions.

From the transcript of the vice presidential debate: link here for the full transcript

BIDEN: Number two, with regard to bankruptcy now, Gwen, what we should be doing now -- and Barack Obama and I support it -- we should be allowing bankruptcy courts to be able to re-adjust not just the interest rate you're paying on your mortgage to be able to stay in your home, but be able to adjust the principal that you owe, the principal that you owe.
That would keep people in their homes, actually help banks by keeping it from going under. But John McCain, as I understand it -- I'm not sure of this, but I believe John McCain and the governor don't support that. There are ways to help people now. And there -- ways that we're offering are not being supported by -- by the Bush administration nor do I believe by John McCain and Governor Palin.
IFILL: Governor Palin, is that so?
PALIN: That is not so, but because that's just a quick answer, I want to talk about, again, my record on energy versus your ticket's energy ticket, also.

This really struck me - especially as a parent of a two year old. My spouse and I are working very hard with our son to learn proper communication styles. We are emphasizing eye contact and appropriate response to questions. We reiterate with him that he must answer what we ask and acknowledge that he hears and understands our questions.

I am not yet the parent of a teenager, but I have worked with them for years in corrections. I have also been married for over 11 years. None of these things individually make me an "expert" in communication, but I know a thing or two about what makes for successful conversation.
If I were ever to have answered my parents questions in the way that Palin did, or talk to my spouse (or have my spouse talk to me) in the way that she did, we would have some severe relationship problems.

What I don't understand is how we accept this behavior from someone who is nominated to be the US vice president when we wouldn't tolerate the behavior in our children or our spouses - and can you imagine if we went to work and responded to our bosses in the way Palin responded to questions? There would be a heck of a lot of unemployed people. Why do republicans continue to defend her nomination?

olympics: synchronized swimming

The 2008 Olympics started today. I love the olympics. I love to watch a lot of sports, and I particularly enjoy watching the olympics. Some of the sports I take more pleasure in watching and I honestly don't watch them all. One sport which makes me laugh is synchronized swimming. Don't get me wrong, I can appriciate the athleticism of these ladies (why are they always ladies?)
I once went to deep water aquasize and I had an asthma attack, swallowed water and almost drowned "WITH" a floatation device on trying to kick and lift my shoulders above the water. I know these swimmers are athletes. I laugh though because really - the glitter and noseplugs?


Because the cameras are on they keep their sparkling eyes open and smile UNDERWATER with creepy noseplugs. What is not funny about that?

war quote

In his final televised Address to the Nation on January 16th 1971, President Dwight Eisenhower said:

"We must guard against the acquisition of unwarranted influence, whether sought or unsought, by the military-industrial complex... Only an alert and knowledgeable citizenry can compel the proper meshing of the huge industrial and military machinery of defense with our peaceful methods and goals, so that security and liberty may prosper together."

Somehow I don't think there has been much "meshing" with peaceful methods and goals, but there certainly has been the acquisition of unwarranted influence.

Public SERVANTS

On the 30th of May the premier of Alberta and his cabinet made a decision to given themselves a 30 percent pay increase, adding between $42,000 and $54,000 to their salaries and making them the highest paid cabinet in the country. There was no corresponding increase in their job duties. One-third of the salary MLA's get is tax-free. Ministers will also now be paid separately for cabinet meetings, Treasury Board and policy committees. These roles were considered part of their duties - and salary - until now. (read more about it here) According to the premier the pay hike was needed to attract good talent to the positions in the future because "people between 25 to 45 years old told him there was no incentive to run for government if they had to abandon their pension and job security".

SHUT UP. Even BEFORE the pay increase he was drawing over 150 grand per year. What 25 year old is not attracted to that? I call B.S. - if it was to attract new people in the future then the increases should have been given AFTER this government was moving on. And since when was being in politics about being motivated by the money?

The premier of Alberta now draws a salary of $213,450. It should be illegal for sitting politicians to increase their OWN salaries.

a) increases should be decided for the NEXT group of elected officials, not for sitting officials who are making decisions in their own interest.
b) the people who voted these individuals into office should have a say in whether there is an increase or not
c) when the price of gas is skyrocketing and the cost of living is increasing at such a rate as to demand that individuals take second jobs, or have both spouses work, etc. etc. then NO increases in salary should be given to elected officials.

There are currently in the office where I work, four employees. The combined salary of all four of us is LESS than what the premier of Alberta makes.

So much for "serving the public".